Confession Might Be Good for the Soul But Not Always for the Listener

via Daily Prompt: Confess

I recently read an article, Skincare for Boobs, and it mentioned ingrown hairs on nipples. So far, I haven’t had this happen, but I must confess that I’m no stranger to having an ingrown hair in an embarrassing place.

Many years ago, I developed an ingrown hair from shaving my bikini line. The offending hair was between the top of my right leg and my groin area. The skin around it swelled to the size of a large orange. It was so big that it impeded my ability to walk.

Naturally, I told all of my friends and work colleagues about my testicle-shaped growth. And, just as naturally, everyone had a solution. Most of the solutions were the same because most people aren’t very original and, in fairness, nobody had ever experienced this phenomenon. The two solutions were to press on it and make it pop, or put hot compresses on it to make it pop.

I tried both options and nothing worked. The next day, I was in TJ Maxx, in a sun dress, and I felt liquid gushing down my leg. I must have exclaimed, because everyone around me started staring at my leg and recoiling. For all the world, it looked like I wet myself.

I dumped my not-yet-paid-for purchases and beat it out of there. By the time I got home, the giant lump was gone and my dress was soaked.

Thank God this happened before iPhones were invented.

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